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*1/2 stars out of five
Yay, somebody has finally made the cinema version of X-men. Unfortunately, it should have been left alone. Bryan Singer, the guy who introduced us to "The Usual Suspects" picked up the reigns for the cinema release of X men. For those of you that didn't care for the cartoon, X Men are a bunch of superheroes who protect the world against evildoers!! Earth of the future is populated with mutants (or genetically advanced individuals)to whom evolution has dealt a swift blow. Mutants possess special abilities- powers that make them feared by regular folk. However, Charles Xavier the esoteric millionaire philanthropist has developed a school(I came to this conclusion myself- I couldn't see the government shelling out the bucks for secret underground aircraft hangers) where mutants can learn to harness and control their superpowers in addition to the regular NZQA recognised courses (including workshop classes and cabbage maths for the not so bright superheroes).
Xavier's regular bunch of genetically enhanced individual's includes:
Cyclops: aka James Marsden (i thought it was Matt Damon), who can cook his own lunch with a single gaze.
Storm: aka Halle Berry: one look at her crap wig and villains will die laughing.
Rogue: aka New Zealand's Anna Paquin: Rogue's touch drains the lifeforce from anyone. Come to think of it was it her touch..or her lines??
Jean Grey: apart from having the crappiest name, Jean Grey aka. Famke Janssen can read minds and move things (what happened to breaking necks with your legs Miss Onatop?)
Wolverine: aka Aussie, Hugh Jackman: with a skeleton reinforced with metal alloy and a hairdo reinforced with plenty of Fudge, Wolverine is a tough nut. Retractable blades come out of his hands; exceptionally useful for his day job at a Japanese Teppanyaki bar.
Overall the movie was not great. I have a rule of thumb to apply to bad movies: despite a shit dialogue, plot etc. as long as the delivery is entertaining a film can be okay in my books. I struggled to be entertained by this one.
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